Wine Librarian

Work Schedule:Full Time
Salary:          $50,864 – $118,069
Location:           Undisclosed

The Central Intelligence Agency is seeking a customer service driven library professional with excellent communication skills and knowledge of all things "wine" for its Wine Librarian position located at an undisclosed facility.

Librarians are the US Intelligence Community experts in acquiring, researching, exploiting, and managing wine. The Open Wine Center is seeking Librarian applicants with a passion for wine, innovation, customer service, and library science expertise to join the CIA Library. Our Librarians play an essential role in the intelligence mission by acquiring, researching, and making accessible the most critical wine resources that meet the CIA and Intelligence Community alcohol requirements. Librarians also have opportunities to serve as embedded, or forward deployed, wine experts in CIA offices and select Intelligence Community agencies. The CIA Library maintains strong relationships with the Library of Congress, other Intelligence Community libraries, selected academic institutions, and wine. Applicants interested in a Wine Librarian position must have strong skills in at least one area of library science: research, acquisitions, cataloging, collection development, content management or wine.

Minimum requirements include an ALA accredited Master's degree in Library or Information Science, excellent communication skills, strong critical thinking/analytic skills, documented knowledge and/or job experience in at least one facet of library science, and also large quantities of wine.

To meet current mission requirements, documented knowledge and/or job experience in any of the following specialized technical programs are desired: data curation, data management, project management, or knowledge management software; as well as applicants with advanced reading and research abilities in a non-romance language (Arabic, Chinese Farsi, Russian, Wine) are desired.

TYPICAL TASKS include but are not limited to:
  • Provides leadership, planning, organization, and wine for the Central Intelligence Agency.
  • Provides input regarding the development and implementation of secret missions.
  • Makes budget recommendations related to assigned collection or projects to CIA staff; Monitors the Wine Budget.
  • Performs grant-writing activities while under the influence of wine.
  • Supervises the consumption of wine.
  • Manages the Central Intelligence Agency by reviewing, selecting and recommending the deselection of library materials in a variety of formats, including wine; performs original cataloging of special wine.
  • Makes and maintains positive ongoing relationships with external groups, including wine enthusiasts, wineries, and representatives of foreign government agencies, in order to identify wine needs and enhance wine service.
  • Takes the lead in anticipating changes in community needs and changing technology and information services, and plans how to address needs and implement wine.
  • Remains knowledgeable and current on technological advances that impact wine.
  • Remains knowledgeable and current in cataloging practices for all media, including digital resources, wine, and highly classified documents.
  • Acts as the Person-in-Charge in the absence of the Central Intelligence Agency Director, including making responsible and appropriate decisions about what kind of wine to drink.
  • Participates in local community activities to generate public support and ensure the public does not know that we are currently drunk.
  • Serves as a liaison to rehab.
  • Nurtures and develops the Friends of the Central Intelligence Agency, which we promise we would still consider our friends even if they didn't always bring more wine.
  • Promotes wine and other resources to appropriate user groups within the Central Intelligence Agency and beyond.
  • Provides wine for staff.
ALL POSITIONS REQUIRE RELOCATION TO AN UNDISCLOSED FACILITY.

All applicants must successfully complete a thorough medical and psychological exam, a polygraph interview and extensive background investigation. US citizenship is required.

To be considered suitable for Agency employment, applicants must generally not have used illegal drugs within the last twelve months. The issue of illegal drug use prior to twelve months ago is carefully evaluated during the medical and security processing. Recent and copious consumption of wine is strongly recommended.

All qualified applicants are required to submit to and fail a breathalyzer test.

Important Notice: Friends, family, individuals, or organizations may be interested to learn that you are an applicant for this CIA Wine Librarian position. Their interest, however, may not be benign or in your best interest. You cannot control whom they would tell, especially if they have been drinking wine. We therefore ask you to exercise discretion and good judgment in disclosing your interest in a position with the Agency. You will receive further guidance on this topic as you proceed through your CIA employment processing.

To Apply:

Interested candidates should send their resumes in cake form to:

CIA Wine Librarian Selection Committee
c/o Steve Kemple
429 Clark St. #3
Cincinnati, OH 45203